Thanks to a tip from Ross, I have for some time been following a very funny fotolog by Francesco Rabaglia, aka Papa Fan (papa is Italian for pope, differentiated from papà – dad – by the stress). It’s hard to see the humor unless you understand Italian well: basically the writer is putting funny captions in heavily “Germanized” Italian on photos of Pope Benedict (also known in Italy as Papa Ratzi).
A few days ago he published an original poem, translated here with permission. Keep in mind that this is not quite normal Italian – there are no Ks in Italian, but they are often used in humor and comics to denote a German accent.
Io zone joseph ratzinger, zon ztate porporato
I am Joseph Ratzinger, I was empurpled [made cardinal]
i signori kartinali poi mi hanno kandidato
the lord cardinals then made me a candidate
per difentare pape e komandar tutto il papato
to become pope and command all the papacy
e per piu’ di tre motivi me lo zone meritato
And for more than three reasons I have earned this
il primo è ke ho koperto kolui ke era indagato
The first is that I covered he who was under investigation
per motivi di stupro e di abuso reiterato
for reasons of rape and repeated abuse
su pimpi e su minori, da parte del prelato
of children and minors, on the part of the priesthood
dimentikate tutto: il fatto non c’è ztato
Forget all that: the fact never occurred
zekonde: io zono zolo un umìle servitoreh
Second: I am a humble servant
nella distesa vigna che zta a kaza del signoreh
in the extensive vineyards of the house of the Lord
produce fino autoctono in krante quantitah
producing local wines in great quantity
ne bevo fenti litri ad ogni messa qui in città h
I drink twenty liters at every mass here in town
per terzo poi io kredo ke zi debba ritornare
For third, then, I believe we must return
alla messa tridentina abrogando la volgare
To the Tridentine mass, abrogating the vulgar / Vulgate
